Amal, a beautiful, young, Emirati woman, was the first colleague I got to know at my new job. Simply because her desk is close to mine. I was glad that my desk is right next to Amal’s.
Every day I go to work, Amal would greet me with the biggest smile ever. She has a sweet smile that is sure to get you over your griefs.
As her name indicates, Amal is full of hope, dreams, aspirations and all the optimism a person can have.
Sorry, allow me to rephrase that: Amal was full of hope, dreams, and all the aforementioned.
Yesterday I arrived at work, ready to be the first to announce the good news of Pamela Anderson, and expecting to be greeted with her lovely smile, but it was no where to be found.
Instead, Amal looked so devastated, as if someone close to her had passed away. I really thought so, but I remembered the conversation we had last Thursday:
me: you seem so excited today, Amal.
Amal: Yes! My boyfriend and his family are coming to propose tomorrow!
me: The two love birds will FINALLY be together!
Amal just burst with laughter and joy! … Little did she know what will happen later that day.
Unlike any other day, I was greeted with no smiles, no nothing … silence and heartache prevailed. Yes, she was heartbroken. You could see it in her dreary, teary, eyes … I dared not say a single word.
First I thought the suitor’s parents rejected her, but no, it was the other way around: Amal’s parents gave the poor fellow ONE option only. If he truly wants her, he has to pay more than half a million Dirhams! (more than $ 140,000). 300,000 dirhams for her dowry (in cash), and the rest for the wedding party, which has to go on for days and nights, attended by as many as a thousand guests!
Of course the newly graduate suitor could not afford to pay that absurd amount money and, against his will, wisely decides to try his luck elsewhere. He knew for a fact that nothing will change her parents’ minds. She’s beautiful, smart and educated, and they know that one day a man with a pocket full of money, regardless his age, education or sophistication, will hear of her beauty and drag her, gift-wrapped, back to his home.
I’m sure I haven’t seen the end of Amal’s smiles, but I know that they won’t be as joyful and cheerful as before. And knowing Amal, I’m sure that she’d rather go on living her life as a spinster, than be traded under the pretext of “caring for her future”.
well it seems like a local emariti girl story…
see UAE ppl r good bas in society wise they have major major problems one of them is this one …the others can vary between drugs,drunk fathers,adultury and no real family care…some people envy them for the money they have but they dont know how much their lives r away from happiness
Yes Nimir, you’re right … it is a true and sad story of an Emirati girl, and this is but one of the social problems UAE women face in their daily lives.
That is just bull shit!!and they wonder why adultry is increasing!!If two people want to get married nothing should stop them except god, not parents not anyone!!This is bull!!
what did she do to fight this? u know it bites sometimes i want to help and dont know how, maybe a letter to her father reminding him of his religion, maybe a letter of recomendation of the kid
or maybe a letter to her relatives to talk to her parents about it, may be a local center that cares for woman issue? no? those parents are either poor they dont have a television and they never heard a sheikh saying 7aram 3alieko or read in the magazines all about it, or they DUMB and choose to shut their inputs, shoo hal 3alam el 6arma!
that’s a typical story in this society
they exaggerate a lot when it comes to marriage expenses. I swear the amount of money wasted on one wedding, including the dowry, clothes and bride’s gold could feed a small poor country in Africa. Of course it’s a purely social habit and has nothing to do with Islam!
but i think she have to try more with her parents
wow that is sad! poor Amal…sometimes you think we are way beyond that ignorant money obsession. bas people are always proving that there is no end to it. very sad indeed!
not exclusively an emarati story.. we all have these types of stories in our societies lil asaf.. true il nesbeh hon aktar but still u wud hear of pali/jor/leb/syr girls being wed to really rich ppl whom they cant even share one opinion with just for the sake of having a “guaranteed” future. pun intended.
id say she shud fight for whats rightfully hers.. happiness.
Ghrab: yeah, it’s utter nonsense!
Mariam: She probably had a fight with her parents, but what’s she to do? elope? they’ll most probably disown her. And by the way, her parents are not poor at all.
Oriental Arabesque: indeed, the money wasted on weddings is too much!
Sam: yes, it’s so sad to see this is still going on in our region
Verbal Alchemy: it’s not exclusive for one nation, you’ll find such stories all around the world …
then find an article on the web about this issue (with maybe islamic reference) print and mail…
who knows! maybe an outsider can tap better on their hearts than their daughter (whom should NEVER elope, not because her parents would disown her, but she would lose her guy’s respect)
okay, that’s just effin’ idiotic!
i mean, i seriously don’t get it! leish il fashkhara? howwe ma fi 7ada khallaf banat gheiro? for crying out loud, i mean,my uncle, “a friggin’ multi-millionaire” whom i’m not exactly fond of due to his capitalist behavior sometimes, only asked for 5000 JDs. which is FAIR. why does some idiot numb skull think that his daughter is worth MONEY? friggin’ STUPID and insulting and degrading to women and himself. a brick probably has more brain cells than he does.
i’d elope if i were in their shoes!
At first i thought you were writing about me
(my name is AMAL too :)even the character seemed like me..lol.. without the last sad part..
Well it is sad that people still do that.. may parents always told me, never look at the money, look at the person who will share your life with.. money will never make a person, a person makes them..
I feel sorry for the young guys who want to get married and life’s costly matters doesnt allow them to..the prices are getting higher and everything is expensive.. Allah ye3een el shabab.. and girls and their parents have to be understanding, if the couple want each other, money should not be the first consideration.. InshaAllah ahelha beghayro ra2yehum..
المشكلة عند نسبة مش قليلة من الاهل انهم بفكروا البنت عبارة عن سلعة و يلي بدفع اكثر مفروض هو يلي يربح هالسلعة بغض النظر عاشت البنت مرتاحة او رجعت لبيت اهلها مكسورة الجناح لا سمح الله
انا بعرف انو اغلى اشي عند الاب و الام هو الاولاد لكن مش لدرجة تحويلهم لسلعة و عدم الاكتراث لمشاعرهم بحجة انو هما راح يختارولها الافضل و انها ما بتفهم بهيك مواضيع
طبعاً كل ما اسمع موضوع بيحكي عن المهر بحكي الحمدلله الي ما عنا من هالحكي ، و انا هون بقصد الشركس و عشان التوضيح اكثر فإحنا المهر و المؤخر عنا محدد مسبقاً من الجمعية الشركسية ، يعني المهر عنا 150 دينار فقط لا غير و يلي بطلب اكثر من هيك بيلتعن اساسه و المؤخر 300 دينار و مع هيك برجع بحكي الحمدلله امورنا ماشية و ما عنا نسب طلاق عالية الحمدلله
dude wher do u work?
bass i thought el sharkas moslemeen?
i dont know if setting a predefined amount works, but u know what? setting a ceiling “may” work, bass we all know the story of Omar ben El khattab who tried to advice people to reduce el maher, and a woman jumped up by saying that Allah doesnt say that “qintar thahab” … verse, and then Omar said, Omar is wrong and the woman is right, so we know we cant even set a high limit that easy, and im not sure it would work either
Mariam: that’s very thoughtful, to send them an article with some islamic reference. but I’ll pass
Mazz: Absolutely. The parents do it thinking they’re safeguarding their daughter’s future. But what they don’t know is that by doing this they are forcing her to live with someone she’ll most probably never love, and hence the adultery, polygamy and other social issues. Not sure if elopement will work with them, the local cummunity here is pretty small, and they’ll be living as outcasts if they eloped.
Amal: Yeah, life is getting more competitive, and it’s hard for young men who are looking for stability.
Na3ouri: Exaxctly! Parents are treating their daughters as merchandise. But I’m getting confused: are you na3ouri or sharkasi?
cool123: I work for a government organization, but how’s that relevant?
na3ooori bas ana ba3raf bardoo el sharkas ba36oosh elaa la sharkasee wela la2 ????
Nimir,
E7na el sal6eyeh a7′athna menhom 7′awa ba3ed ma kataloona
loooooooooooooooooooooooool
bebalash kaman men ‘3air 7ata el 150 neeeerah
Who-sane
انا شركسي ناعوري
Nimir
في ناس بيعطوا و ناس لأ
Mohanned
الله محييك يا سيدي
انت الخير و البركة ابو العربيات
بس اغلبك ممكن تشرحلي شو قصدو نمر لما حكا انو حتى ببلاش بدون الـ 150 نيرة ؟!؟
Wallahe ya na3oori athon enno hath called sarcasm, ya3ni el biss el kbeer ga3ed begool aah bejawzooko o bebalash kman, bas hoo gasdo enno ygool Bas balash yjawzooko ba3ed ma katalooko, 3alamtoo 3lena ya ostaz na3oori, bas bardo magbooleh
eh hada na3ouri ze3el ya zalameh 7agak 3alaina
Mohanned , Nimer
الواحد ما بزعل من حبايبه بالعكس استاذ نمر لا زعلان ولا على بالي انا بس كنت حابب افهم شو المقصود ، يعني لا تفسرها انو ناعوري زعلان
و شكراً استاذ عربيات عالتوضيح و عجبتني البس الكبير .. لول :p
بعدين تعال جاي احنا ما بدنا ننسى هذي المشكلة ، يعني يلي انضرب انضرب و يلي انفشخ انفشخ انسى يا معلم احنا اولاد اليوم
ترجعوا تهاوشوا ؟؟
mar7ba el gamee3 bde 2salem 3leko fe hal site el 7elo
I wonder how much money Jordan has made from his shoe line? Probably in the billions!